That Time I Had No Internet For 3 1/2 Days

Day 1: Tuesday, July 23
Are you kidding me?

Today I woke up with the plan to be productive. I was going to apply for a couple internships since I finally have a completed resume. Then, I was going to upload the rest of my pictures from Italy to my computer and put them on Facebook so my life looks fun to other people.

After I had breakfast and took a shower, I opened up my computer to log onto the Internet and discovered that it wasn’t working. No big deal, I’ll just restart the router and it’ll be fine. This happens sometimes.

Nope. Still didn’t work. My brother noticed too, I restarted my computer and the router at least two more times, and still nothing. So I texted my dad. That’s when I realized that not only was our Internet completely useless, our TV wasn’t working and neither was our home phone. Thank you, Verizon Fios.

So in the meantime I sat and waited around on my phone (Thank the lord for 3G networks), thinking that all of this would be resolved in an hour or two after my dad called the Verizon people. Well, I end up on the phone with some representative named Jacob who sounded like a 14-year-old boy, who then instructed me to unplug some battery backup box in my basement. After searching for it amidst my cats’ litter boxes, I finally restarted the thing and to my disappointment – still no Internet.

Jacob called my father back to set up a time for a technician to come to my house and repair everything. So he’d be over in a few hours right?

WRONG. At first they said SATURDAY. IT IS TUESDAY. I was furious, my dad was pissed, my mom texted me “Give them he’ll!!!!!” and my brother was in disbelief. My dad managed to get them to move it up a day – ONE DAY – so the technician would come on Friday. Still ridiculous, but after hearing “I understand your frustration” and “I’m sorry for your trouble” over and over again, that was the best we could get because “there’s a huge delay” and they “can’t expedite anything at this time.”

I never applied for those internships. I uploaded the pictures to my computer, but that’s as far as they got. The rest of the day I spent drinking wine, harassing Verizon Fios via Twitter, and napping. I might be drunk and/or unconscious right now if it weren’t for my iPhone and its 3G network.

Day 2: Wednesday, July 24
It hasn’t gotten any better.

Thankfully, today I worked so I wasn’t home for 7+ hours. If I was, I don’t know where I’d be at this point. Pretending to be one of my cats? Stuffing my face with every single item in my fridge?

I don’t have any plans for the rest of the night (story of my life), so I don’t really know what I’m going to do between now (8:15 PM) and until I fall asleep. I guess I could clean my room, or tweak my resume even more, or exercise, or read a book. We’ll just have to see where the night takes me.

BY THE WAY, can I tell you how PISSED I am that I missed my favorite show Pretty Little Liars last night?! It’s one thing to take away my Internet, but TV? Especially on the night that my favorite show plays? Verizon Fios, you suck.

Day 3: Thursday, July 25
Send help.

Yeah, today wasn’t fun. I tried – I really tried – to see this as some kind of blessing in disguise. I went to the bank today and got my eyebrows done, so there was that hour-ish of time where I left the jail cell you could call my house. I tried being artsy and constructing a birthday card for my friend out of ribbon and construction paper. It came out cute so far, except for the part where I burnt myself after pressing down on the glue from the hot glue gun (I’m smart) with my finger right after applying it.

I can go without TV. I can go without a home phone. BUT I NEED MY INTERNET.

I found a Wi-Fi connection. It’s not a strong one, but it didn’t require a password and it actually kind of loads. I feel like I cheated. Was this some kind of test in the first place? Am I being punished? Did my parents do this on purpose to see if I could survive without the Internet? If so, HA. Jokes on you all.

I think I charged my phone about 3 separate times today because I was on it so much using the 3G network. Hi, welcome to my life.

The guy is supposed to come tomorrow to fix this. THROATS WILL BE SLIT IF I RETURN FROM WORK TOMORROW AND MY HOME IS STILL 17TH CENTURY STATUS.

Day 4: Friday, July 26
HALLELUJAH.

It’s back. My Internet is back, which is how you are seeing this. My TV is back. My home phone is back (which I kind of didn’t miss – it keeps ringing, and it’s getting annoying).

Okay, okay. So this wasn’t so bad. Three full days without Internet isn’t the end of the world. I mean, it’s pretty traumatic but it’s not, like, worth going insane over.

But boy am I glad to see it back and working. That full bar of Wi-Fi never looked so good.

…You know, I think I might head outside for a little bit. It’s actually really nice out tonight.

*shrugs*

2 comments
  1. Vinny said:

    This post scares me for the future of this country lol Granted I can’t live w/o internet aswell so I’d go crazy w/o it >.<

    • Haha I feel the same way! Don’t worry though, this post was mostly an exaggeration… mostly.

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